jus a sudden thought
a bbq session with my friends on tuesdae allowed me to realise tt one of my frens, ah huat~!, was abit schizophrenic.. i was wondering what has made him become like this..
a few days ltr, i went to talk to him, we agreed to have a heart to heart session. so i was asking him, why didnt he wanna share his problems with his close frens or even me, since the 2 of us are quite close. n he said something tt realli touches my heart, realli deep down. i was taken back, cos he's the first one who's able to sae all these which i have been thinking of, thru out the yearss.. he told me
'jin shun, we are all jokers.. deep down at a little corner of our heart, it is dark n filled with spider webs and dust. these webs n dust actualli symbolise our problems, our unhappiness or unwillingness. frens ard us nvr notice this little dark corner of urs, even if they do, they do not realli care so much, as they think those will be cleared soon'
clear enough, it was what i m feeling. even when we feel down, we dun feel like sharing, we wan the pple ard us to feel happy, and not adding on to their worries. even when we tell them our problems, they do not realli care, as they think we will recover from it very soon or even tt we are kidding.. i think tt's realli true.. i've lost my laughter in sch, in life and everything.. weights are loading in rather than unloading from the stressful mind of mine. i've tried to remove them but i failed. i m wondering why. it must be the years of bottling myself up tt causes this. maybe i will explode 1 dae, veri soon, i wonder.
maybe guys do have PMS also bah.. i m not sure.. but sometimes, when i m quiet or alone, i will think.. think deeply.. looking at the dark corner of my heart, trying to solve or remove them but it always tends to accumulate even b4 i have the time to remove them.. frens asked me why didnt i share my problems, maybe i dun see a need to it bah.. issit? i also not sure.. maybe it's the habit tt has be formed unconsciously thru out the yrs bah.. anyway, i m fine.. jus hope to be the cheerful me back again.. i wanna find the real side of me.. please.. i m in search of it now.. n i think i will find it real soon.. take care all~
a few days ltr, i went to talk to him, we agreed to have a heart to heart session. so i was asking him, why didnt he wanna share his problems with his close frens or even me, since the 2 of us are quite close. n he said something tt realli touches my heart, realli deep down. i was taken back, cos he's the first one who's able to sae all these which i have been thinking of, thru out the yearss.. he told me
'jin shun, we are all jokers.. deep down at a little corner of our heart, it is dark n filled with spider webs and dust. these webs n dust actualli symbolise our problems, our unhappiness or unwillingness. frens ard us nvr notice this little dark corner of urs, even if they do, they do not realli care so much, as they think those will be cleared soon'
clear enough, it was what i m feeling. even when we feel down, we dun feel like sharing, we wan the pple ard us to feel happy, and not adding on to their worries. even when we tell them our problems, they do not realli care, as they think we will recover from it very soon or even tt we are kidding.. i think tt's realli true.. i've lost my laughter in sch, in life and everything.. weights are loading in rather than unloading from the stressful mind of mine. i've tried to remove them but i failed. i m wondering why. it must be the years of bottling myself up tt causes this. maybe i will explode 1 dae, veri soon, i wonder.
maybe guys do have PMS also bah.. i m not sure.. but sometimes, when i m quiet or alone, i will think.. think deeply.. looking at the dark corner of my heart, trying to solve or remove them but it always tends to accumulate even b4 i have the time to remove them.. frens asked me why didnt i share my problems, maybe i dun see a need to it bah.. issit? i also not sure.. maybe it's the habit tt has be formed unconsciously thru out the yrs bah.. anyway, i m fine.. jus hope to be the cheerful me back again.. i wanna find the real side of me.. please.. i m in search of it now.. n i think i will find it real soon.. take care all~
posted by confusion at 8:16 PM
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